This post may include affiliate links to products we think you'll find useful. We may earn a small commission if you buy through these links. Read our affiliate disclosure.
A few decades ago, the idea of a guy dating a woman 10 years younger would have raised a lot of eyebrows. But these days it’s common to see an older guy with a hot younger woman on his arm.
For many guys, the idea of being with a younger woman is a huge turn on. It’s easy to imagine how a sexy younger woman full of energy and enthusiasm will make all your fantasies come true.
But apart from the possibility of lots of hot sex, there are also a lot other great reasons to be with a younger woman. As an older guy more set in your ways, there’s a lot you can learn from someone with a younger view of the world.
There are also a lot of potential problems that you’ll have to learn to navigate. After all, you’re not getting any younger. Are you going to be able to give her what she needs over the long term?
In this article I’m going to look at all the pros and cons of dating a woman 10 years younger than you.
The benefits of dating a woman 10 years younger
1. She’s enthusiastic & curious
As you get older, you get much more set in your ways. You’ve probably started to find your purpose in life, whether it’s through your work or some other activity that gives you meaning.
You also feel the weight of responsibility on your shoulders. The time for messing around and taking risks is long past. You need to knuckle down and grind it out to make sure you have a stable future.
Your likes and dislikes are also a lot more fixed. There’s much less chance that you’re going to change the direction of your life or try something radically new just for the fun of it.
But your younger girlfriend is full of youthful enthusiasm and curiosity. Her mind is wide open and her future looks like an expanding horizon of infinite possibilities.
She doesn’t feel like her life plans are set in stone and she’s excited to try new things and explore what the world has to offer.
And if she does have goals for the future, she’s willing to take risks and chase her dreams with youthful energy. She’s young enough to assume that everything will work out in the end and doesn’t get dissuaded by setbacks.
If you’re lucky, some of her enthusiasm and curiosity will rub off on you. She’ll help you to be more spontaneous, try new things and think about more than just the daily grind.
2. She’s full of energy and fun to be around
Once you get a bit older you start to feel a lot more tired. You work hard during the week and it takes it out of you. All you want to do on most weeknights is crash in front of the TV and switch your brain off. You wish you had the energy to have more fun outside of work but even the idea feels exhausting.
But your girlfriend is 10 years younger than you and she has unlimited reserves of energy. Even after a long day at work or school she’s ready to head out and party, see a show or embark on a crazy, spontaneous adventure.
And she encourages you to get off the couch and enjoy life with her. Once you make the effort to get out there you realize all the experiences you’ve been missing out on.
3. The sex is amazing
You just can’t get enough of her beautiful smooth skin, sexy curves and youthful glow. Every time you look at her you can’t believe how attractive she is and you want to rip all her clothes off right there and then.
And because she’s a lot younger than you, she’s not as experienced in the bedroom. She’s still discovering what turns her on and she’s excited to experiment and try new things.
She also has unlimited reserves of energy to make love for hours. The only question is whether you can keep up with her.
4. There’s less pressure to settle down
Dating a woman 10 years younger than you might mean she puts less pressure on you to settle down. She’s still young enough to not feel the pull of her biological clock and less likely to be thinking too much about starting a family.
A lot of women also eventually start to get pressure from their parents or other family members to get married and start giving them grandchildren.
But that doesn’t mean you get to keep things fully casual and not give her any commitment. In fact, she’s probably had less serious relationships than you so far and might be craving the feeling of being in a serious and committed relationship.
If you’re not looking for commitment from your younger woman then enjoy the ride while it lasts. Sooner or later she’s going to break up with you and look for a guy who can deliver.
5. She has a different view of the world
You can learn a lot about the modern world by looking at things through your younger girlfriend’s perspective.
Technology and culture moves so fast these days that 10 years difference in age can feel like a lifetime. Get ready to be introduced to a whole new world of apps, TV shows, music and celebrity culture that you never even knew existed.
The rise of social media means that younger people have a very different way of relating to each other and forming relationships. They’ve never known a world without social media profiles that instantly communicate what they think and what makes them tick.
Younger people are also starting to realize that they are inheriting a world that older generations haven’t cared for very well. They worry about social and environmental issues that even 10 years ago were on the fringe.
These kinds of differences will give you a fresh and interesting perspective on life that will keep your mind open to new ideas.
6. You can teach her a lot
Your younger partner can help keep you on the pulse of politics and culture, but you can also teach her a lot as well.
Being 10 years older means that you’ve already experienced more of the obstacles and curve balls that life can throw at you. She has to push through all these roadblocks in her own time, but you’ll be there to comfort her and give her good advice.
Younger people can also get more upset and depressed by the problems they face because they’ve never had to deal with them before. Your age gives you a little more emotional maturity to act as a calming balance to reassure her that it’s not the end of the world.
The carefree attitude of youth is a wonderful thing, but eventually everyone has to think about the future and make some plans. You’ve seen where a lot of different pathways in life can take you. This allows you to provide a practical perspective to help her make decisions that will give her an advantage in life.
How to make any woman want you (without saying a word)
In a recent study, women were shown pictures of men and asked to rate their attractiveness on a scale of 1 to 10.
But the researchers did something sneaky: they included multiple pictures of the same men standing and sitting in different positions with slightly different facial expressions.
Amazingly, women rated the same man very differently based on how he held himself. One way of standing would get him a rating of 5 or 6, and a minor adjustment would get him scores of 8 or 9.
How is this possible?
In ancient times, before spoken language existed, men had to seduce women without saying a single word. Body language was a man’s only tool to turn a woman on and convince him to sleep with her. As a result, the sexual part of a woman’s brain is much more responsive to the signals your body is giving off than to anything you say.
Relationship coach Kate Spring can show you how to use these body language signals to tap into any woman’s primal, biological desires and make her attracted to you.
These psychological body language techniques are so powerful that they bypass the logical part of a woman’s brain and compel her to think sexual thoughts about you. It doesn’t matter if she already has a boyfriend or has put you in the friend zone. She might even hate you, and she still won’t be able to resist.
And the best part is that these female mind hacks work for any guy. It doesn’t matter how attractive, wealthy, or confident you are talking to girls.
It sounds like a big claim, but Kate Spring is the real deal. She’s developed her methods using Harvard research and scientifically-validated psychological techniques.
Check out Kate’s free video presentation here.
The negatives of dating a woman 10 years younger
1. She might make you feel old
In many ways your younger girlfriend makes you feel younger. Her endless energy (in and out of the bedroom) is intoxicating and makes you feel good to be alive.
But you can’t hide from the fact that you’re 10 years older and you can’t keep up with her all the time.
Every time she heads out to party without you because you’re too tired it will remind you of your age. And the same goes for every time you say no to sex because you don’t have the energy.
The extra aches and pains in your body will also remind you how much older you are. She can stay on her feet all day but your back hurts and your feet are sore.
And if you stay together, you have to accept that you’re going to hit middle or old age a full decade ahead of her.
2. Society will judge you
These days, most people are a lot more forgiving of an older man being with a younger woman. But you should still expect some people to give you judgemental looks or snide comments.
One study showed that you’re more likely to be judged as an older man for dating a younger woman than the other way around.
Most commonly, you’ll be accused of being a sugar-daddy. They’ll think that the only reason she could be interested in you is because you buy her things in exchange for sex.
Or perhaps they’ll shift the blame onto her and accuse her of having daddy issues. They’ll assume her father didn’t give her the love or attention she craved as a child so she’s replaced him with you. Another study in 2016 showed that this isn’t the case at all..
Even worse, if your age difference is big enough, some people might even make the mistake of thinking she’s your daughter.
If you are in the relationship for the right reasons, don’t let this narrow minded attitude make you feel embarrassed. Most of the guys judging you would secretly kill to be in your shoes.
3. Younger men make you feel threatened
You may be older and wiser, but it’s still hard not to feel a little bit threatened by younger men. Coming from the same generation gives them a common connection. They’re at the same point in their lives and share many of the same insecurities, hopes and dreams.
They also share the same youthful energy which you struggle to maintain on a good day. And even worse, you can’t help doubting why she’s with you when hot guys her own age are constantly hitting on her and asking her out. There’s a voice in your head that says one day she’s going to give in to temptation and cheat on you with a younger, fitter guy.
4. She doesn’t know what she wants from life
Part of the appeal of dating a younger woman is that she’s carefree and spontaneous and doesn’t worry too much about what the future holds.
But after a while it can be frustrating to be with someone who hasn’t yet figured out what they want from life. Your age means that you’ve been forced to plan for the future and you’re grinding away to make your dreams a reality.
Often you wish she was more settled and had a direction in life so you could work together towards a common goal.
5. Her family will judge you
In the same way that society will judge you for dating a woman 10 years younger, so will her family.
Her parents might think you’re a great guy but they would much prefer that she dates a guy closer to her own age. It’s even very common for parents to try and forbid their daughters from seeing an older guy.
She’s a fully grown adult and can date whoever she likes, but disapproval from her parents will make things much more difficult for her (and you).
Even though you’re with her because you’re completely in love with her, you need to see things from her parents perspective. They just want what’s best for their daughter and they think she’ll be judged for being with an older guy.
In many cases, her parents will also be worried that her choice of partner reflects poorly on them as well. They worry that all their friends will gossip behind their backs and think they failed as parents.
The best case scenario for them is to think their daughter is going through a rebellious phase. Sooner or later they assume she’ll get bored with you and move on to someone more age appropriate.
What not to do when dating a younger woman
1. Don’t judge her for being young
Your age gives you wisdom and experience, but don’t judge her for not seeing the world through younger eyes. She might seem a little naive at times but it’s not her fault. She hasn’t had to face many of life’s challenges and needs time to develop the more sophisticated worldview that comes with age and experience.
2. Don’t act like her father
Your girlfriend loves the fact that you’re mature and have your life on track, but she’s not looking for a replacement for her father.
All men have a biological hero instinct to protect and provide for the women they love, but that’s very different from trying to be her father as well as her lover. So don’t scold her like a child when she makes a mistake or try to be an authority figure in her life.
3. Don’t patronise her
She might be 10 years younger than you, but that doesn’t mean she needs you to solve all her problems.
Always treat her questions and problems with respect and don’t patronize her or talk down to her if she doesn’t have everything figured out. Instead, remember that you were 10 years younger once and give her the benefit of your experience if she asks for advice.
It’s also important to make sure you don’t always take charge in the relationship. It might be tempting and easy to do, especially when most people you interact with will defer to you as the older man.
4. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not
The worst thing you can do when you’re dating a younger woman is pretend to be something you’re not. If you try to dress younger to impress her or talk like her friends use you’ll only end up looking and sounding like a poser.
The reason she’s chosen to be with you is because you’re not like all those other immature guys her age. She likes the fact that you’re older and more mature so lean into it and charm her with your sophistication.
