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22 bare minimum standards you should expect in a relationship

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When it comes to relationships, it’s essential to have clear and healthy expectations. It’s easy to get caught up in the idea of a fairytale romance, but it’s important to remember that every relationship has its challenges. Keep reading to explore the 22 fundamental standards you should expect in a relationship. By establishing a solid foundation, you and your partner can create a happy and lasting partnership.

1. Open and honest communication

Open and honest communication is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. It involves expressing your thoughts, feelings, and concerns with your partner in a clear and genuine manner. For example, if you’re feeling overwhelmed by work, it’s essential to share your feelings with your partner rather than bottling them up. Similarly, if you disagree with a decision your partner has made, it’s important to express your perspective respectfully and calmly, rather than resorting to passive-aggressive behavior. 

By fostering open and honest communication, you create an environment where both partners feel safe and supported, ultimately strengthening the bond between you and paving the way for a deeper, more meaningful connection.

2. Willingness to engage in difficult conversations

A willingness to engage in difficult conversations is crucial for maintaining a healthy relationship. These conversations may involve discussing sensitive topics, addressing unresolved issues, or confronting uncomfortable emotions. 

Avoiding tough topics only leads to unresolved issues and resentment, so make sure you both face them head-on with respect and understanding.

For instance, if you’re concerned about your partner’s spending habits, it’s important to discuss your worries openly, even if it feels challenging. Similarly, if you’ve noticed a change in your partner’s behavior or mood, initiating a conversation can help identify and resolve potential issues. 

3. Respectful disagreement and conflict resolution

It’s natural for partners to have differing opinions and viewpoints, but how you handle these disagreements is crucial. For example, if you and your partner have opposing opinions on a political issue, it’s important to listen to each other’s perspectives without resorting to personal attacks or dismissive behavior. 

When conflicts arise, focus on finding a solution together rather than trying to “win” the argument. Practice active listening, validate your partner’s feelings, and be open to compromise. 

Related post: How often do couples fight? (+ 9 tips for healthy arguing)

4. Trustworthiness and reliability

Being trustworthy means that your partner can depend on you to be honest, loyal, and consistent in your actions and words. 

Reliability, on the other hand, involves being there for your partner when they need you, whether it’s for emotional support, practical help, or just being present in their life. 

When both partners exhibit trustworthiness and reliability, it creates a strong foundation of trust and security in the relationship. This trust allows you and your partner to navigate challenges with confidence, knowing that you have each other’s backs.

5. Honesty and transparency

Along with trust, honesty and transparency are key to maintaining a healthy relationship. This means being truthful with your partner about your thoughts, feelings, and actions, even when it’s difficult. It’s important to remember that honesty fosters trust, and trust is the foundation of a strong partnership.

6. Keeping promises and commitments

Keeping promises and commitments is a vital aspect of maintaining trust and integrity in a relationship. When you make a promise or commitment to your partner, it’s essential to follow through and uphold your word. This demonstrates that you value and respect your partner’s feelings and expectations. 

If you’re unable to fulfill a commitment, be honest and communicate the situation openly. By consistently keeping promises and commitments, you strengthen your bond with your partner, creating a foundation of trust, respect, and reliability in your relationship.

7. Respecting privacy and boundaries

Respecting privacy and boundaries involves understanding and honoring your partner’s personal space and limits. For example, if your partner has expressed the need for alone time after a long day at work, it’s important to respect their wish and give them the space they need to recharge. Similarly, if your partner sets boundaries around sharing personal information with family or friends, it’s crucial to respect their wishes and not disclose sensitive details without their consent. 

8. Empathy and understanding

Empathy involves putting yourself in your partner’s shoes and trying to understand their feelings, experiences, and perspectives. For example, if your partner has had a tough day at work, empathizing with their situation and offering a listening ear can help them feel heard and understood. Understanding is about acknowledging and accepting your partner’s emotions, even if you may not necessarily agree with their perspective. 

By cultivating empathy and understanding in your relationship, you create a strong emotional bond and a safe space for both partners to express themselves openly and honestly.

9. Willingness to provide comfort during difficult times

Life is full of challenges, and it’s important that you and your partner can lean on each other during difficult times. Whether it’s a personal loss, a stressful situation, or a health issue, being there for each other and providing comfort is essential to maintaining a strong and supportive relationship.

10. Encouragement and motivation

A strong partnership involves lifting each other up and providing encouragement and motivation. This means supporting your partner in their goals and aspirations, and celebrating their achievements along the way. By being your partner’s biggest cheerleader, you help create a positive environment where both of you can thrive.

11. Emotional availability

Being emotionally available means being present and receptive to your partner’s feelings and emotions. For example, if your partner is going through a difficult time, it’s essential to offer a listening ear and provide support rather than brushing off their concerns. Similarly, emotional availability involves opening up about your own feelings, allowing your partner to understand your emotional state and offer their support in return. 

12. Shared decision-making

A strong partnership involves making decisions together, whether it’s about finances, living arrangements, or future plans. Working together and considering each other’s input creates a balanced and harmonious relationship where both partners feel valued and respected.

13. Mutual respect and appreciation

Respecting and appreciating your partner is essential to maintaining a healthy relationship. This means valuing their thoughts, feelings, and opinions, and showing gratitude for the love and support they provide. Demonstrating mutual respect and appreciation encourages a loving and nurturing environment for your relationship to flourish.

14. Support for each other’s goals and aspirations

A healthy relationship involves supporting each other’s dreams and ambitions. This means being there for your partner as they pursue their goals, offering encouragement and assistance when needed. Supporting each other’s aspirations helps strengthen your bond and create a partnership that’s built on mutual growth and success.

15. Physical affection and touch

Physical affection is a crucial aspect of any romantic relationship. This can include holding hands, hugging, kissing, and other forms of touch that help to maintain a close and intimate connection. By expressing love and affection through touch, you nurture your emotional bond and create a strong sense of closeness with your partner.

16. Quality time spent together

Spending quality time together is crucial for maintaining a strong connection with your partner. This means setting aside time for each other, whether it’s going on dates, enjoying shared hobbies, or simply relaxing at home. Spending quality time together helps strengthen your bond and create lasting memories.

17. Space for individual growth and hobbies

While it’s important to spend quality time together, it’s also essential to give each other space for individual growth and hobbies. This means supporting your partner’s interests and passions, even if they differ from your own. By allowing each other the freedom to pursue personal interests, you maintain a healthy balance and encourage personal growth within your relationship.

18. Encouragement of personal development

A strong partnership involves encouraging each other’s personal development. This means supporting your partner as they learn, grow, and evolve as a person. By fostering a supportive environment where both partners can pursue self-improvement, you create a dynamic and thriving relationship.

19. Maintaining separate identities and friendships

In a healthy relationship, it’s important to maintain separate identities and friendships outside of the partnership. This means nurturing your own interests, hobbies, and social connections, as well as encouraging your partner to do the same. 

Related post: 21 signs you’re losing yourself in a relationship

20. Support for each other’s independence

Supporting each other’s independence is vital in a strong relationship. This means allowing your partner the freedom to make their own decisions and choices, while also trusting and respecting their autonomy. By promoting independence, you create a partnership that’s built on mutual trust and respect.

21. Shared vision for the future of the relationship

A healthy relationship involves having a shared vision for the future of your partnership. This means discussing your long-term goals, desires, and expectations, and working together to create a plan that aligns with both of your aspirations. Establishing a shared vision ensures that you’re both moving in the same direction and building a future together.

22. Consistency and stability

Consistency and stability are crucial components of a healthy relationship. This means being reliable and dependable for your partner, as well as maintaining a predictable and secure environment for your relationship to thrive. Providing consistency and stability gives a sense of safety and trust that deepens your bond.

Final thoughts

Recognizing and upholding these bare minimum standards is essential for nurturing a fulfilling and healthy relationship. By setting clear expectations and communicating openly with your partner, you can create a strong foundation for a lasting and loving partnership. Remember, a healthy relationship is built on trust, respect, and open communication, so don’t be afraid to discuss these standards with your partner and work together to achieve a happy and balanced relationship.

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