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When a guy stares deeply into your eyes and doesn’t look away, it feels exciting and intimidating at the same time.
His intense stare makes everything else fade into the background. Time seems to slow down, and all you can see are his eyes boring deeply into your soul.
This heady mix of excitement and danger can make it hard to tell what his stare means, especially if he stares into your eyes without smiling. Does he like me? Does he want me to make the first move?
In this article, I’ll show you the power of eye contact and what it means when a guy stares into your eyes in such an obvious way. I’ll also give you some tips on how to respond to his stare if you’re attracted to him, or you want him to leave you alone.
1. He’s attracted to you
If a guy is staring deeply into your eyes, it’s a clear sign that he’s attracted to you. He knows he’s being super intense by staring, but he just can’t help himself. This is especially true if he also holds your gaze for a long time without looking away.
When you catch him staring at you, hold his gaze back and see what happens. If he looks away quickly, then he was probably just checking you out and he’s not interested in anything more. But if he holds your gaze, then he’s definitely interested in you and is trying to send you a flirty signal.
There are also lots of other clues you can get from looking at his eyes and facial expressions:
- Raised eyebrows are a very good sign of sexual attraction. This is why a sleazy guy in a comedy will often make super exaggerated raised eyebrow movements.
- Dilated pupils have also been shown to signal arousal. Although if you want to check this one for yourself, you’ll have to get very up-close and personal.
- He’ll probably also be smiling if he is attracted to you, but this isn’t a guarantee. If he looks serious or almost predatory, it could be that he’s trying to hold himself back from leaping over the table and kissing you.
Also, make sure to follow where he looks when he breaks eye contact. If his eyes go straight to your chest, then you can be even more confident he imagines you naked.
If you want to let him know you feel the same way, hold his gaze and smile back. You can also give him a flirty look by looking down and then up at him through your eyelashes.
2. He’s flirting with you
The eyes play an important role when men and women flirt, but flirting with the eyes is more commonly associated with women. I’m sure you’ve seen a romantic movie where a girl is ‘batting’ her eyes at a man.
But guys can flirt with their eyes as well, and a huge part of it is staring deeply into your eyes. It’s the best way for a guy to signal that he’s attracted to you. If a cute guy is staring at you intensely and you stare right back, you can almost hear the sexual tension in the room ratchet up to a boiling point.
Keep in mind that if a guy is flirting with his eyes, he might not always stare. If he glances at you and looks away quickly, it can also signal attraction. When a shy guy likes you, he won’t have the confidence to fully stare at you.
Flirting with the eyes is almost like a game of chicken. The guy is trying to see how long he can hold your gaze before you look away. And you’re trying to see how long you can hold his gaze before he breaks eye contact.
The longer you can hold each other’s gaze, the more attraction will build between you. So, if a guy is staring at you, don’t look away too quickly. Instead, hold his gaze and see what happens next.
3. He’s creating sexual tension
Eye contact is a great way to increase the sexual tension between you and a guy. As you keep staring at each other and glancing away, you feel the connection and the sexual energy building with every passing moment. It feels electric, and everyone else in a crowded room fades away until it feels like just the two of you.
You both know what’s happening, but for the moment you’re just enjoying the suspense and the lead-up to something more. If you’ve caught a guy’s eye at a party or a bar, this sexy game might continue all night until one of you finally makes a move.
If you want to take things further, start making small moves that will signal your interest. Touch your hair, neck, or lips while he’s staring at you to signal that you want to be kissed. If he’s looking at your lips, licking yours might even send him over the edge.
You can also smile and look down at the same time to let him know that you’re interested and available. This is a way of saying with your body language that you want him to come over and talk to you.
4. He’s trying to figure you out
If a guy is looking at you and it feels like he’s searching your soul, that’s because he probably is. People often say that a person’s eyes are the windows to the soul, and this is especially true when it comes to attraction.
When a guy looks deeply into your eyes, he’s trying to understand who you are and what makes you tick. He wants to know what your interests are, what kind of a person you are, and if you two would be compatible.
5. He’s creating intimacy
Staring into someone’s eyes can create a powerful sense of closeness and intimacy. It’s almost like you are sharing each other’s thoughts and feelings without saying a word.
In a study published in the Journal of Research and Personality, participants were asked to stare into each other’s eyes for two minutes. The results showed that people felt more connected to their partners after the eye-gazing exercise, and even reported having more intimate romantic relationships outside of the lab.
6. He wants you to trust him
When a guy looks deeply into your eyes, he is also trying to earn your trust. He wants you to feel comfortable with him and to know that he is a trustworthy person.
It’s very difficult to lie or hide your true intentions when you are looking into someone’s eyes. Even minute changes in the shape of your eyes and the way you blink can give away what you’re feeling. It’s also just very hard not to trust someone when they are looking at you so intently.
Think about how much personality is expressed through the eyes of cartoon villains and heroes. Evil characters often have narrow, shifty-looking eyes that dart around looking for an opportunity to take advantage of someone. On the other hand, a trustworthy hero will have big, wide, innocent-looking eyes. You instantly know the type of character they are just by looking at their eyes.
7. He’s interested in what you’re saying
If he’s staring intensely into your eyes without smiling, it might mean he’s really interested in what you’re saying. He wants to understand your point of view and he’s hanging onto every word.
Or perhaps he finds you super smart or funny, and he’s mesmerized by everything you say. He might even feel a bit intimidated by you and feels like he has to focus on making sure he doesn’t say anything dumb.
In addition to staring into your eyes, he might also lean in closer to you or tilt his head to the side. These are all signs that he’s engaged in the conversation and wants to hear more.
8. He’s trying to impress you
It’s human nature for a guy to try and impress a girl he likes. He wants to show you that he’s a great catch and would be perfect boyfriend material. Either that, or he wants you to think he’s worth hooking up with.
One way to seem more impressive is to make direct eye contact with you while he’s telling you all about himself. He wants to seem confident and self-assured, and he’s hoping that strong eye contact will make you see that he’s a trustworthy, cool guy that’s worthy of your attention.
I’ve already mentioned that looking deeply into someone’s eyes makes them appear more truthful and sincere. So even if he’s embellishing all his impressive achievements, you’ll be more likely to believe him if he’s making eye contact.
Studies have also shown that we rate people as more intelligent when they maintain strong levels of eye contact. So you’ll also be more likely to think he’s smart as well as accomplished!
9. He’s confident in himself
Maintaining eye contact with someone creates a powerful and intimate connection that a lot of people find intimidating.
If a guy is shy or embarrassed, he’ll often subtly glance at you and look away. He’d love to lock eyes with you and stare, but he doesn’t have the confidence. But a confident guy isn’t afraid to stare deeply into your eyes. He wants you to know that he’s looking at you, and he’s not afraid to connect with you on a deeper level.
10. He feels comfortable with you
Showing confidence is a good thing, but he might also just feel very comfortable around you. He doesn’t feel the need to look away or feel shy around you because he knows that you like him and he trusts that you won’t judge him.
When we feel relaxed and comfortable with someone, we let our guard down and we act more like our true selves. If he feels like he can be himself around you, then he’ll also feel comfortable staring deeply into your eyes.
11. He’s showing male dominance
In the animal kingdom, making eye contact is often a show of dominance and aggression. If two males spot each other and they make eye contact, it’s often a prelude to a fight.
Of course, a guy you just met in a bar isn’t going to start a fight with you (I hope), but he might be subconsciously trying to show that he’s a strong alpha male who’s ready to take charge and protect you.
Some women might want this, but it’s a pretty old-fashioned way of thinking, and most women today prefer a guy who’s more in touch with his feelings. All the women I know would find these kinds of mind games extremely unattractive and might even laugh in the guy’s face.
12. He’s completely in love with you
When a guy stares deeply into your eyes, it might be because he’s completely in love with you. He wants to drink in every detail so he can build a mental picture to hold onto when you’re not around.
Or perhaps he just wants to stare into your soul because he’s so in awe of you and the deep connection that you share. Either way, it’s a pretty amazing feeling to know that someone loves you so much that they can’t take their eyes off you.
13. He’s a hopeless romantic
Some guys are just naturally romantic and they love looking into a woman’s eyes because it makes them feel all loved up and giddy inside. If he’s a bit of a softie, then he might not be able to help himself from staring deeply into your eyes.
14. He’s giving you permission
If a guy gives you an intense look, it could be his subtle way of giving you the green light to make a move. He wants you to know that he’s open to your advances and you should go over and talk to him.
Take notice of other body language cues that signal attraction. These signs can be subtle, and might include grooming himself, mirroring your posture or stance, and pointing his feet in your direction.
Of course, this only works if you’re also interested in him. If you don’t want to encourage him, then it’s best to avoid making eye contact and look away quickly.
15. He wants you to remember him
It’s much easier to remember what someone says or does if you’re looking directly at them. If a guy is interested in you, he wants to ensure that you remember him, so he’ll stare into your eyes while you’re talking.
It’s pretty rude to be looking around the room or checking your phone when someone is talking to you so he’s looking at you to make sure he has your full attention. This is especially true if you’re in a noisy environment and he has to compete for your attention. He’ll want to make sure that you’re looking at him and not someone else.
The secret weapon to make him obsessed with you
All men feel a powerful urge to compete. It comes from ancient times when every day was a fight for survival to protect their tribe and provide for their families.
The stakes are much lower today, but the competitive urge remains deeply rooted in male biology. Instead of fighting saber-toothed tigers, men channel their competitive energy into work, fitness, acquiring wealth, or earning the respect of their peers.
Imagine if you could harness all this competitive energy and make a man obsessed with winning your love.
You can. And all you need to do is trigger a biological switch inside him that will make him see you as the ultimate prize.
Relationship psychologist James Bauer calls this switch the “hero instinct,” and it explains why some women have men falling all over them while others struggle to find lasting love.
Triggering a man’s hero instinct taps into his competitive spirit and makes him see your relationship as an opportunity to prove himself as a man. Making you happy gives him purpose and a “game” to win.
Instead of you chasing him, he will jump through hoops to impress you and win your approval. In a matter of days, he’ll become more protective, committed, and attracted to you than you ever dreamed possible.
And the best part is that you can do all this without playing hard to get or acting like a damsel in distress.
This free video presentation from James Bauer will show you exactly what to say, what texts to send, and what to ask your man to trigger his hero instinct and make him utterly obsessed with you.
It sounds almost too good to be true, but it’s the real deal. James’ techniques use simple yet powerful psychology to help you tap into the deepest desires that all men feel.
Here’s the link to the free video again.
What different types of eye contact mean
So far, I’ve discussed all the different reasons why a guy stares directly into your eyes and doesn’t look away. But other types of more fleeting eye contact can also tell you a lot about what he feels about you.
1. The unconscious glance
This is the most common level of eye contact and it’s usually completely innocent. He might just glance at you for a second or two before looking away again.
It could be because he finds you attractive and wants to check you out, but he doesn’t want to stare and give you the wrong idea.
Or it might be a complete accident and he didn’t mean to let your eyes meet at all. He was just looking around the room and his gaze happened to land on you for a second. This happens all the time, especially in crowded places, and it’s no big deal.
2. The meaningful glance
If a guy glances at you and looks away but then glances back again, it’s a good sign he’s interested in you. As I discussed earlier, he’s probably just too shy to stare directly into your eyes.
You might notice him gradually working up the courage to glance at you for longer and longer. I’m only talking about 1 or 2 seconds, but you’ll easily tell that he means to stare.
You can also tell a lot by the way he breaks eye contact. If he looks away quickly, it means he’s shy and doesn’t want to stare. But if he lingers for a little bit before finally looking away, it shows that he doesn’t want the intimate moment to end just yet.
Also, notice what direction his eyes go when he looks away. If he looks down, it’ ‘s more likely that he likes you. But if he looks to the side, this is a more dismissive gesture and he might not be interested.
3. The intentional gaze
There’s no mistaking an intentional gaze. He’ll hold eye contact with you for 4 or 5 seconds and it might almost start to feel awkward before he looks away.
4. The deep stare
A deep stare is when a guy stares into your eyes and doesn’t look away. It feels like he’s trying to look deep into your soul or bore into your mind with his eyes.
Only people who are very comfortable with each other can stare at each other for this long without it being weird. If a stranger tries it, there’s a good chance you’ll feel very uncomfortable after about 6 or 7 seconds of sustained eye contact.
How to respond to intense eye contact
When a guy is staring at you intensely, there are several different things you can do to encourage him or shut him down.
If you want to encourage him, your best bet is to directly stare back at him and smile. This will give him an invitation to keep staring at you or, even better – come over and start a conversation. Back this up with some other (often subconscious) nonverbal attraction signals, such as playing with your hair, biting your lip, or exposing your neck.
But if you’re not interested and want him to stop staring, you can just look away and he’ll usually get the hint. And if he keeps trying, just make a point of not looking at him at all, and eventually, he’ll give up.
Final thoughts
The way a guy looks at you can tell you a lot about what he’s thinking and feeling. If he stares deeply into your eyes, it’s usually a good sign that he likes you. Of course, there are always exceptions, and a lot of tough guys use eye contact as a way to intimidate people and show dominance.
Just use your judgment, and look for other body language signs of attraction to be sure. When you start to see a pattern of several attraction signals, then you can be very confident that he’s interested in you.
