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When you have intense chemistry with someone, it’s an exciting and addicting feeling. You share a powerful connection that almost feels spiritual, and you’re drawn to each other in ways you can’t quite put into words.
It can even feel a little scary to feel so strongly about someone – especially if you’ve just met them. But don’t worry, it’s perfectly natural to feel this way. Sometimes you meet someone who clicks with you on a deep level, and you should feel lucky to share such a special bond.
If you’re struggling to understand why you feel so intensely about someone, here are 25 signs that you have intense chemistry with them.
1. You can’t stop touching each other
The most obvious sign of intense chemistry with someone is when you can’t keep your hands off them. It feels natural and comforting to be close to them, but at the same time, their touch feels like electricity. You crave the addictive feeling of butterflies in your stomach when you hold their hand, stroke their hair, or hug them.
This feeling of electrical connection magnifies even more if you’ve just met. You find all kinds of excuses to be near them and touch them because you can’t help yourself. Your leg “accidentally” brushes against theirs under the table, and your hand constantly reaches out to touch their arm when they say something funny or insightful.
2. You can’t stop looking at each other
Staring into someone’s eyes for a long time is a very intense and powerful experience that makes many people uncomfortable. If you’ve accidentally locked eyes with a stranger for too long, you know exactly what I’m talking about.
But when you have intense chemistry with someone, you can’t stop yourself from staring. Every chance you get, you glance at them to see what they’re doing or to gauge their reaction. And when your eyes inevitably meet across the room, it feels like time stops for a moment. You both stare at each other, wide-eyed and transfixed until one of you finally breaks contact and looks away.
This happens time and time again until you both start to feel a little embarrassed. You might even find yourself getting lost in their eyes and get shocked when you realize you’ve been staring directly into each other’s eyes for a full minute.
3. Your body language is open
You may find yourself mirroring their body language when you’re very attracted to someone. For example, you might sit in the same position, cross your arms the same way, or tilt your head to the side like they do when they’re listening intently. This behavior is entirely subconscious and designed to create a sense of rapport and closeness.
You also keep your body language open and inviting to make it clear that you’re interested in them. Signs of open body language include facing them directly, uncrossing your arms, and keeping your hands visible.
There are also many other non-verbal body language signs of intense chemistry to look out for. Women often twirl their hair, lick their lips, or expose their necks when attracted to someone. Men tend to sit or stand up straighter, puff out their chests, and smooth imaginary wrinkles out of their clothes.
4. The sex is amazing
Of course, mind-blowing sex is a pretty clear sign that you have intense chemistry. The physical connection between you is so strong you can’t keep your clothes on for more than five minutes at a time.
Not only is the sex physically satisfying, but it’s also profoundly emotionally satisfying. You feel like you can be completely open and vulnerable to express your needs and desires. You have a deep level of intimacy and trust that allows you to let go and enjoy yourself completely.
5. You can’t stop thinking about them
When you feel intense chemistry with someone, you can’t stop thinking about them. You replay every past conversation over and over in your mind, and you role-play future encounters in your head.
You obsess over details in your mind that most people would forget – what color their eyes are, what TV show they mentioned they liked, or what necklace they were wearing. You even find yourself looking up information about them online to try and get to know them better. Even more embarrassing, you’ve even considered what your children would look like.
6. You bond over shared values or goals
When you share a deeply-held belief or goal with someone, it creates a powerful sense of connection. For example, you might meet someone who shares your deep passion for the environment or someone who also wants to travel the world and live a nomadic lifestyle just like you.
You can’t believe how perfect they are for you when you discover this shared value. You feel understood on an entirely different level – even more deeply than your friends and family. In some respects, it even feels like they know you better than you know yourself!
7. You share a similar sense of humor
Men and women consistently rate a sense of humor as one of the most important qualities they look for in a partner. If you find yourself attracted to someone who makes you laugh, it’s an excellent sign!
When you share a similar sense of humor, it feels like you ‘get’ each other. Even if no one around you is laughing at the same things, you find each other hilarious. You might even start to finish each other’s sentences because you know exactly what the other person will say.
8. Time does strange things
Feeling strong chemistry with someone can do strange things to your perception of time. You can talk to them for hours, but it feels like only minutes have passed because you’re so engrossed in the conversation. The expression “time flies when you’re having fun” has never felt more appropriate.
Conversely, minutes can feel like hours when you’re excited to see them again. You keep checking your watch, willing the time to move faster until you’re finally reunited.
9. Other people notice your connection
Your friends and family will notice when you have an intense connection with someone. All the shared glances, giggling, and physical contact makes it pretty hard to ignore. Even strangers can sense the electricity between you!
They might give you (and each other) knowing smiles or even start making jokes about how you’re meant to be together. This can be a little awkward if you’re not ready to admit your feelings yet, but it’s a sure sign that other people can see the chemistry between you.
10. Silence feels comfortable
When the chemistry is intense, conversation flows easily, and you can talk for hours without running out of things to say.
But just as importantly, you’re also comfortable sitting in silence with each other. You don’t need to fill every silence with awkward small talk because you know that just being together is enough. You’re content to sit and be in each other’s company without needing to say anything.
11. You can talk about anything
It doesn’t matter if you’re discussing the latest celebrity gossip, your deepest fears, or your wildest fantasies – you feel like you can talk to them about anything.
You share a level of trust and intimacy that allows you to be completely open and honest with them without fearing judgment. They are the perfect sounding board for your thoughts and feelings, and you know you can always rely on them for an unbiased opinion.
And even when they disagree with you, they do it in a way that feels respectful and supportive. You know that they’re not just trying to win an argument but truly want to understand your point of view.
12. You finish each other’s sentences
You’re on the same wavelength so often that you start to finish each other’s sentences. You know what they’re going to say before they even say it, and it almost feels like you can read each other’s minds.
You share a similar way of thinking and communicating, and you intuitively understand each other in a way that few others do. This can be frustrating for the people around you, who don’t know why you can’t slow down and take turns speaking.
13. You have inside jokes
Even the most mundane things can be hilarious when you have great chemistry with someone. You find yourself making jokes about things nobody else would even find remotely funny. But to you, they’re hilarious because they only make sense to the two of you. They’re a shared secret between you that further deepens your connection.
14. You only have eyes for them
Even in a crowded room, it’s like no one else exists when you’re with them. You only have eyes for them, and everyone else fades into the background.
They command all of your attention, and you find yourself hanging on their every word. You also can’t help but notice every little detail about them – from how they style their hair to how they cross their legs.
Even your phone becomes an irrelevant distraction when they’re around. You can’t help but stare at them, drinking in every detail. And when they catch you looking, the butterflies start fluttering in your stomach all over again. You can’t help but smile, knowing they’re thinking the same thing about you.
15. Your connection feels spiritual
When the chemistry is intense, it feels like you’ve known each other in a past life. You have an instant connection and an undeniable bond that draws you to each other. It’s like you were meant to be together, and no one else could ever understand the depth of your connection.
You share a unique intimacy that goes beyond the physical, and you can’t imagine ever being without them. They feel like a soulmate, and you know that no matter what happens in this life, you’ll always feel a connection to them.
16. They make you laugh and smile
You can’t help but laugh and smile when you’re with them. They can lighten up the mood and make even the most difficult situations seem bearable. You find yourself gravitating towards them whenever you need a pick-me-up because you know that they’ll always make you feel better.
17. You can be your authentic self around them
We all put up walls and show the world a version of ourselves that we think they want to see. But when you have great chemistry with someone, you can let down your guard and be your authentic self.
They don’t try to cheer you up with false positivity when you feel sad. They understand that you need to feel your emotions, and they’ll sit with you in silence until you’re ready to talk. Or, if you’re angry, they’ll listen to your rant without judging or dismissing your feelings. They know how to support you through the good times and the bad, and they make you feel safe and loved no matter what.
You don’t have to put on a show or pretend to be someone you’re not because they love you for exactly who you are. They make you feel comfortable in your own skin, and you know they will never judge or try to change you.
18. You don’t need words to communicate
You often know what they’re thinking and feeling just by how they look at you. It’s almost like you can read each other’s minds.
No matter how hard they try to hide their emotions, you can see right through them. You know when they feel sad or anxious and what’s bothering them without saying a word.
This deep level of understanding creates an incredible bond between you, and it’s one thing that makes your chemistry so unique.
19. They make you want to be a better person
Being around them makes you feel like anything is possible, and they inspire you to be a better version of yourself. Talking to them gets you fired up to accomplish your goals and dreams, and feeling the intense connection reminds you of what’s truly important in life.
You know they believe in you, even when you don’t believe in yourself. And their faith in you gives you the strength to keep going when things get tough. You want to make them proud and strive to be the best person you can be because of them.
20. You tease each other
The point of teasing is to show someone that you know them deeply, you’re comfortable enough to make fun of their insecurities, and you know where to draw the line, so you never hurt their feelings.
Teasing comes naturally when you have great chemistry with someone. You know exactly what to say to get a rise out of them, and they enjoy your playful banter. It’s all in good fun, and it’s just another way to show each other how much you care.
21. You remember everything they say
It’s amazing how good your memory becomes when you’re talking to someone you’re attracted to. You couldn’t remember what you had for breakfast yesterday, but you can remember even the most minor details about things they said weeks ago.
Why? Because you hang on to their every word and everything they say fascinates you. You constantly replay conversations in your head, and you can’t wait to talk to them again so you can hear more about their life, their thoughts, and their opinions.
22. You notice the little details
Not only do you remember everything they say, but you also notice all the little details about them that most people would ignore.
You remember what they were wearing the first time you met them, and you know exactly how they like their coffee after hearing their order once. You notice when they get a new pair of shoes or shirt or wear a pair of earrings that you’ve never seen before.
These details matter to you because you’re obsessed with learning everything about them. They help form a more detailed picture of their likes, dislikes, habits, and quirks, and uncovering a new layer of their personality always makes you smile.
23. You feel nervous before seeing them
I’m sure you’re familiar with the expression “butterflies in your stomach.” It’s the jittery, nervous feeling you get when you’re excited about something.
The sense of nervous energy gets ratcheted up to 11 when you have an intense connection with someone. Instead of a few butterflies, there’s an entire flock of birds flapping around in your guts.
It sounds horrible, but it’s actually an addictive feeling that makes the early stages of a relationship so intoxicating. You can’t wait to see them again; in the meantime, your mind is running wild with all sorts of possibilities for what might happen next.
24. You try to get alone time with them
You crave time alone with them so you can really get to know them on a deeper level. It’s not that you don’t enjoy being in a group setting, but being one-on-one makes your intense connection even stronger.
When you’re finally alone, you feel more comfortable opening up and being truly yourself. You can have long, uninterrupted conversations where you get to know each other’s hopes, dreams, fears, and goals.
25. You can’t stop talking about them
At a certain point, your friends, family, or suffering work colleagues get sick of hearing about this person you can’t stop gushing over. But you can’t help it!
You love telling people how amazing they are and describing everything you have in common. You could talk about them for hours, and it’s the next best thing when you can’t be with them.
FAQs
Can other people see the chemistry between two people
If you feel a strong connection with someone, other people can often see it too. Your body language and how you interact with each other is a dead giveaway that something special is going on.
You might find yourselves standing close to each other, touching each other often, making eye contact, and smiling at each other a lot. There’s also a good chance you’ll start acting differently when you’re around them – you might get a little nervous or tongue-tied, or you might laugh or smile more than usual.
Do you have to be physically attracted to someone to have chemistry with them?
No, you don’t necessarily have to be physically attracted to someone to have excellent chemistry. It’s possible to feel a strong connection with someone even if you don’t find them attractive in a traditional sense.
You might be drawn to their personality, intelligence, sense of humor, or any number of other things. Or, you might simply enjoy spending time with them and feel comfortable in their presence.
Can men and women be just friends if they have intense chemistry?
Men and women can be friends, even if they have chemistry. However, being honest with yourself and the other person about your feelings is essential. If you’re physically attracted to each other, it might be difficult to maintain a strictly platonic relationship.
What if you don’t have chemistry with your partner?
If you don’t have chemistry with your partner, it doesn’t necessarily mean your relationship is doomed. Chemistry often develops over time, so the spark may eventually ignite if you’re patient.
Make sure you spend time together doing things that you both enjoy, and take the time to get to know each other on a deeper level. If you’re compatible in other areas, the chemistry will hopefully follow.
What are some signs of bad chemistry?
There are a few key signs that indicate that you might not have good chemistry with someone:
- You’re constantly arguing or making each other angry.
- You’re bored when you’re around them.
- You find yourself trying to make excuses to avoid seeing them.
- Your interactions feel forced or unnatural.
Trust your gut – if something feels off, it probably is.